Have you ever been shocked by something you thought wouldn't ever transpire? Certainly! Life takes us in unlikely places every once in a while and when we reflect on it through our minds rearview mirror, we often laugh and say "I actually thought that would never happen." It's those one in a million 'less likely' moments that bring us the most joy sometimes. Their accompanied joy, is often hard to explain to others because the less likely scenario is usually the one in which no one wants to take place. Imagine those couples who have a strong desire to conceive. I can envision their excitement upon finding out that their long awaited bundle of joy will be arriving in approximately nine months but then finding out that the joy bus would be delivering times two. There's usually immediate anxiety, especially for new parents. But once the babies have arrived, the dust settles along with all of the other doubts and concerns. When their story is shared as time has passed, it's usually filled with laughter about the wonderful 'less likely' occurrence.
Everything doesn't always happen in the way that we would want it to happen but we are a resilient people who are capable of adapting to changing circumstances. If you're currently facing an unlikely situation, try and look on the bright side of it. All unlikely circumstances are not the same, and some are accompanied with a great amount of pain and regret, but take hope in that everything is likely to turn out alright when you face the situation with prayer, honesty, and maturity. Lean back on your yesterday experience and utilize that wisdom for your today.
Waiting can sometimes cause you to feel like your life is at a standstill and it takes a great amount of patience to be still, especially when there is a great amount of uncertainty. Life can sometimes bring us to a place where our next step is unsure. In these moments, try not to worry. That may prove challenging for those who have never had to wait, but sometimes we move ahead of time, only to make mistake after mistake. Consider me for an example. I've moved ahead of myself plenty of times out of fear and the unwillingness to trust a plan in which I had no part in planning. I can attest that some things are just worth waiting for. How many times have you wanted to be in a relationship and ended up settling with someone out of loneliness? Or taken a job because you didn't want to take the chance of waiting for the one that you truly wanted to come through?
I'm sure we all can say yes to one or the other with settled relationships leading the pack. This is the ultimate no, no, being that large amounts of time usually ends up getting wasted, prolonging that inevitable waiting period for the right one.
If you are currently experiencing this kind of waiting period within your life, trust in plan that goes beyond your understanding. Continue to live your life, the best way that you know how, and be patient. We're taught this at a young age but society has spoiled us out of this way of thinking. Patience is a strength that builds character. And sadly, character building isn't something that's sought as often as it should. Money can only take you so far. Have you ever encountered a rich man, with pour taste in life choices? The media often enjoys lifting them up and embarrassingly thrashing them publically at the slightest indiscretion. Or a wealthy woman whose class and dignity amounts to vapors? Work on your character. So why not start with patience?
Mistakes are never made intentionally, that's why they are called mistakes. It's a conscious choice that you make with hopes for a positive outcome. Unfortunately, even when you have the utmost good intent, the end result can prove that a different decision should've been made. Have you ever made a decision based upon what you thought was a good decision, only to have it backfire? I have.
Sometimes relationships last too long, career advancements never happen, and lifestyle changes are never made because we did what we felt was the right thing to do. For instance, you'd be surprised to find out the staggering amount of people who miss out on promotions because they believe that another person with more longevity was more deserving. We assume that longevity equates to productivity and it doesn't. Although that person may have befriended you or even assisted in getting you the position, a higher authority saw value in you but because you wanted to convey a message of loyalty, you passed up an opportunity that may not come around a second time. Even if an opportunity does present itself again, just think, you could've been there way sooner. In the long run, these decisions are usually regretted.
If you find that you're constantly making bad choices, don't beat down on yourself but evaluate what the determining factors are when it comes to your decision making. Your decision to make everyone happy may not be the best for you or them. So, take your time and choose wisely.
Sometimes in life change is inevitable. We may want a particular thing to remain the same while another plan is forming that is completely out of our control. When this kind of unwanted change occurs, it can often throw us off balance. We have a set course in mind, we're comfortable where we are, and would rather deal with our current circumstance than to change and adapt to dealing with another. Feelings of shock and fear are completely natural and understood. What comes to mind when I'm faced with this form of changing is the Serenity Prayer which states, "God grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change; courage to change the things that I can; and wisdom to know the difference."
The key thing is in knowing the difference in what can be changed and what can't. If we can look at all of life's revisions twist and turns in this manner, then we would really obtain serenity. Serenity according to the Merriam Webster is the quality or state of being serene, which in essence means to be calm and peaceful. But some question how such a thing can exist when you're being jolted into unfamiliar territory.
In times of confusion when I start to see things spinning outside of my control, I tend to stop panicking, which usually comes first, evaluate what is actually taking place and imagine all possible outcomes. When I have a clearer perspective of things, it's quite easier to get a handle on my emotions verses them getting a handle on me. Those possible outcomes are then reflected upon and I find myself reasoning with myself and saying that no matter what it will be okay. Trusting that God knows what's best for my life.
If you're dealing with change in your life today and you're having a hard time accepting it, just take a step back from it and breathe. If council from a wiser more experienced source is needed, then by all means seek it. But don't become stagnant and miss out on something that could possibly lead you to a better something. We've all been there at one point and time and things seem to always have worked out in the end. Eradicate the pressure by trusting in God. He'll lead you only where He can keep you. So if you're there, you're safe. Isaiah 26:3, "Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee."
The American history is no mystery and in its stripes bears the fruit of both pain and endurance. As we approach the 50th anniversary of one of the nation's most memorable events, I can't help but to reflect not on the change or lack thereof, of our judicial and legislative system but more so on the hearts of man. While the media often depicts the maliciousness that births from hatred and a warped upbringing, underlies a rebirthing that isn't as frequently noted and publicized. We've all been taught different behavioral patterns in our childhood that others have gotten the opportunity to witness in our adult lives.
Seeing images of the black and white toddlers meme, in which each is reaching for the others hand, with the caption, " No one is born racist," renders a strong message. It's not until seeds are sown into the lives of the young and that seed is nourished, that it begins to bear fruit. When we witness the blatant hate and disregard of human life towards a certain group of people that is based solely on ethnicity, we are literally witnessing a decrepit root. Have you ever experienced an epiphany after responding to a certain situation in a embarrassing way, where you just thought to yourself, 'now where did that come from?' Our genealogy can often bracket us if no time is taken to formulate proper perceptions not based upon the ill minded views of those that proceeded us. Sorry racist mom, dad, uncles, aunts, and grandparents.
I've recently witnessed someone that I know be called a discriminatory person and a bigot. Harsh words to hear and even harsher when they hold absolutely no evidence of being true. As we spoke about the situation that he was encountering, he began to explain his stance on racial issues that plagued African Americans at the time he was being brought up and became overwhelmed while explaining the triumphant attitudes of those he witnessed, overcome some of the most horrible acts of hatred. When I rendered an applause to his current character, he quickly rescinded and mentioned that he had to be "relearned" all over again. He went on to say that he was taught every kind of hateful word in existence and so were his peers but he decided that he didn't want to live his life in that manner. He appeared despondent and somber as he reflected on what his old frame of thinking had been before his rebirthing, but without going into any detail.
I believe all nationalities have found themselves guilty of the aforementioned. We sometimes hear the conversations when we're younger regarding race and we begin to formulate ideas often unrelated to personal encounters. Because we're prone to take on the same dispositions as our loved ones, we adapt to their opinions, no matter how fascist they may be, and never change our views until we grow into a more developed way of thinking. A more developed way of thinking is when you broaden your scope of judgment beyond mere outer appearances because there's a person of every race that you will harm you and one in every race that will love you, not excluding your own.
So as you reflect on the 2000 souls who marched from Selma to Montgomery, also reflect on any bitterness or hate that may lie unresolved within you. If there is a fight to be fought, fight peacefully. Fight with a better way of thinking. Fight against ignorance by educating yourself on your history. As quoted by Martin Luther King Jr., "The ultimate measure of man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." Have the courage to grow beyond any negative frame of thinking that would cause your heart to hate someone, especially without cause. Written By: Davina Sims