Laugh, Cry, Breathe, Write
As I take this journey, I constantly find myself doubting if I'm taking the right steps. Nothing has to be going wrong when these thoughts of insecurity arise but I still allow them to steal my focus away from the thing in which I'm trying to accomplish. In this, I know I'm not alone. Many people who have started their own businesses or set their minds to accomplish a goal have experienced this same kind of doubt, but instead of calling it doubt, I will just say fear.
Often when we step out on faith, we start out strong and courageous. Then somewhere down the line we start to feel anxiety. Is it possible for me to actually succeed? The answer is Yes! The fear and anxiety that we experience is due to us finally breaking away from what others have told us we could do. So when we're faced with an opportunity to excel beyond that point, we self doubt. When those feelings arise, it's up to us to speak life and affirm within that "I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me" (Philippians 4:13). We have the power to take control over our thoughts and turn them around for our betterment.
So as we take our separate paths, remember that doubt doesn't mean stop. Keep going, keep pressing. You're steps away from living your purpose.
Please remember to share. Thank you.
Patience. The word that you undoubtedly don't want to hear when a long awaited desire has yet more time to blossom. The idea of planting appears to be very serene. And it is for those who don't mind waiting through the process. But to a person with very little patience or who lacks the ability to wait on manifestation, it soon becomes an old hobby quick. Unfortunately, we tend to treat the important things in our life the same way. We see the importance in working hard to reap the due reward but still find ourselves complaining throughout the entire waiting process.
Whether we know what the end result will be or not, waiting is difficult. We live within a society that promotes a 'right now' mentality. Everything that we need is being manufactured to be at our fingertips. You don't want to wait in line, order online. You don't want to wait five to ten business days, order express shipping. Nothing seems to be worth waiting for now and days. We don't want to wait for food, travel, or love but what is it that we think we're missing out on if we don't get these things immediately?
I sit and contemplate on the way that I act sometimes and I amaze myself at how unraveled I become when I want something but then I'm told, that I would have to wait. I ask myself, 'do you really need that today and will you be okay without it'? Outside of health concerns, we should all work daily to be more patient because majority of the things that we lack patience for we don't need anyway. Is that cheeseburger really going to provide you with that much satisfaction? Simply wait. Forget what society tells you and search out the more important things going on around you and trust, these small matters will become even smaller.
So the next time that you're in a position of waiting, and you will, please remember to be still and to be quiet. Good things come to those who wait. The Bible teaches that patience is virtuous. Be patient. Peace
The inability to see the finish product when pursuing certain goals can cause an enormous amount of doubt to creep in. I'm currently experiencing this within my own life as I begin to make certain lifestyle changes when it comes to my diet and the way I chose to spend my time. At the beginning of each week I make a decision to watch my spending by spending less on eating out. The benefits of this change alone will be life altering but because I can't see the end results, it's easy for me to stray off course. As of late, this hasn't been the case. I had to literally take a good look at myself before I was able to make the necessary changes to reach my goals in spite of not being able to see the end results. I focused my attention on why I was eating so much and once I discovered that, I was able to address those issues and stop.
Sometimes it helps to pinpoint what exactly is detouring you when it comes to finishing something that you've started. If it's a general lack of motivation, begin to find ways to motivate yourself. Follow those on social media who have made it to where you aspire to be. Read articles daily about those who have made the same accomplishments. It's also good to envision the change that you want to see. The mind is a powerful tool when trying to accomplish goals. Now this can either work for you or work against you. Have you heard that in the mind is where it all begins? Well if you doubt yourself then you've killed your motivational jump start right there. So begin to envision yourself with the task in mind completed. Over time you'll see the end results.
It's also good to remember that consistency is key. So now that you have your goals written down, it's time to make them materialize by staying on task and moving further even when you don't feel like it. The payoff is soon to follow.
Please feel free to share.
Social Media Woes
Have you ever scrolled through your social media feeds to see everyone living blissfully and then just experience an overwhelming feeling of anxiety, regret, and depression? No? Well many others have. The idea that everyone around them lives are going so great causes them to reflect on everything that they wish they had. The usual triggers are those relationship post, travel post, and overall LOOK HOW GREAT MY LIFE is post! But think about it, if one was to take a quick glance at your online album, what would be their impression of your life? Wouldn't they assume that your sunny day photo shoot just before walking into work with your overly priced expresso indicate that one, you're happy about going to work, two that you have a great job, and three that you must be doing alright financially if your morning routine includes a Starbucks stop. You see how easily misleading that image can become once dissected and overly analyzed because in reality, you may be underpaid over budget and that expresso was just your guilty pleasure for the week.
Consider for a moment where these social media sites got their start. Many would hope that its creation was another technological advancement created with the intent of connecting people to one another. Unfortunately, it hasn't, once you consider the actual amount of time that people spend disconnecting from the people that they actually know. Consider what you've done to that friend who calls you on your weekend off. As you're scrolling through your social media feed, you see a very cute family photo of them and so you decide to hit the approved button called 'like,' they see it in their activities list and thereafter decide to call to actually speak with you personally. You see the call, you contemplate the level of offense that's about to take place but yet and still, you send them to voicemail disconnecting yourself from a more personable form of communication. So considering how you yourself neglect actual relationship building, it's now safe to ask why exactly you have a social media account? Were you subconsciously hoping to get a glimpse of what you preceive to be a better life or to pretend that you were leaving one yourself? Are you creating an illusion?
We often find ourselves judging others for the exact same things that we're guilty of.
When did it become so important for us to brand ourselves as perfect? In this world that we live in, consumerism has created a platform for the disillusioned to prove how happy they are based upon their material possessions and what can be displayed over the body with little to no regard for the inner man, the spirit. Our unhappiness stems from not partaking in the ritual of 'have'. Yes. The ads will send a subliminal message to you that if you don't have this certain product, that somehow you're missing out. It creates a want. Never will you see an advertisement that says,"You may not need this" or "This isn't for everyone." No, that wouldn't be profitable so the idea is to get as many people as possible to now need something that they could live perfectly without and now we're trained to do the same, only we're not being paid to do it.
Now, not only social media is bad. There are benefits to finding friends who you haven't seen in a while and reconnecting with people but its intent becomes distorted when we begin to turn to it for the purposes of comparing our lives to one another or for seeking validation. Enjoy this modern technique of communicating moderately and appropriately. A lot of your comparing can be vastly minimized by just deleting the people from your social feed who you aren't social with at all.
So the next time that you happen to find yourself seeking motivation or inspiration and you wonder onto social media, stop! Those images are strategically placed there, majority of the time, to generate a false sense of validation. Instead, look for encouragement in scripture. Seek motivation from close friends and family. Get inspired by making a list of goals and accomplishing them one by one. You can be happy too. Truly happy.
Everything that I need is not outside of me
There are so many advertisements for seemingly everything that we need (or think we need) being sent to our ear and eye gates, from the time that we pick up our morning newspaper, to when we get inside our cars. There's literally someone constantly reminding us of how imperfect we are and how their product will help us get to an impossible state of being. Very rarely, almost never, will you see a clear and visible sign saying just look within. It profits a corporation nothing to make consumers aware that they don't have to spend all their resources (I use that term loosely) to be fulfilled, so it becomes our job to be more conscious of the things that we truly need and to also decipher what’s to be let go.
Think about what is truly needed to survive. Food, water, shelter will of course be the basics, so where did electronics, excessive clothing, and the other material possessions come from? If I've learned anything, it’s that corporations who make advertisements don’t do so to adhere to consumer’s desires but more so to CREATE them. Growing up, I never knew that I needed to have an Atari to complete my Saturday mornings until Atari manufacturers contacted the marketing department and created an entire advertising campaign around me sitting in the the house versus me going outside and doing something more productive and creative. I never thought about playing a video game because I didn’t know what it was until they told me. So Atari never sought to help me out by adhering to something that I wanted, they created the want. They inadvertently told me that if I had this gaming system, I would feel happy…so I must not be happy already, right? WRONG!!! The same thing happens over and over and over to all of us on a day to day basis. Had an Atari commercial never aired, my Saturday mornings would’ve continued to be the same joyful experience that it’d always been. For a child, that may be hard to understand but what about us? We spend much of time working to acquire things that an ad told us would help us be more fulfilled. If I only had this, or that, or this, I would be good. But if ads control your spending patterns, what happens when a new flood of them comes around again and they will. A new desire will be created, making you unhappy with what you currently have, and you’ll find yourself at the exact same place that you were before. So how do we change this pattern of thinking and escape the maze? Simply by searching within ourselves for what we truly need and already have access to.
When was the last time that you looked within yourself to see what’s going on, on the inside? Something like a checkup. Where you just sat quietly and evaluated how you were truly doing? I usually find myself doing this after prayer. If something has been constantly bothering me or if I just need to have that time alone with myself and my creator, I spend some time in prayer (which is a daily practice for the most part), I then meditate, and afterwards I may read the scripture. But what I find is that in those quiet moments is where I learn the most about myself and where I’m able to develop an opinion, diagnosis, and prescription. If we calmly just evaluate the things that have been bothering us, then we’ll see and hear the answers to our concerns more clearly. We won’t rely on a group of people to tell us what we need or provide a false sense of hope.
So the next time that you find yourself spending uncontrollably to fill a void, look within. You may just be due for a checkup.
Please share this with someone who you feel may benefit from it. I will also be posting on this for the next few days in my social media accounts listed below.
Unexpected Life Changes
Things happen and then change follows. We know the routine because we've lived it several times but even with previous experience, unexpected life changes still stagnate us. That's perfectly okay for a time but it becomes a problem when the season has changed and you're still being held back due to something that occurred several months or even years ago.
If you find yourself halted for a long duration of time brought on by various circumstances, it may be time to look at what happened, why it may have happened, and what has materialized from it. Death is a natural occurrence that can't always be explained but even in that, we ourselves must keep living. The loss of a job, relationship, or friend may happen, and although we may believe at that time that we can't live without certain things and people, those experiences usually teach us that we can.
Allow the changes that you've experienced in life to mature you enough to then, plant a seed and water it, to enable the growth of someone else. In 1 Corinthians Paul's says, " I planted, Apollos watered; but God gave the increase." There's someone waiting on your 'overcomer' journey, you only need to take it.
When The Season is Done
Life is what you make it but to have an enjoyable one, will usually involve making some hard but necessary choices. We never want to consider the possibility of losing a friend but the fact has always been and will remain that seasons change and the people within it. This isn't referring to lifelong friendships but more so towards those people in which we try to build forever relationships with when it was never really meant to go past an appointed time. Isn't that how you never end up moving past old relationships? You find yourself questioning and questioning for years why it ended, neglecting the fact that people change and grow apart all the time.
I've heard someone say, "Accept what God allows". If you ever find yourself trying to hold on to a person whether it be for a friendship or a relationship, consider for a moment that the season just may be up. People will come and people will go, just don't become so distracted that you miss the new season in your life.
Forsake Not The Journey
We don’t always get a choice in this life as far as paths go. But in the instance that you’re presented with options, don’t always choose to take the more popular or the easiest. Often the most rewarding journeys are the ones traveled alone. This is not to be applied to every situation because everything doesn’t have to be hard but there will be times when you just have to embrace a journey that will leave you with, more knowledge, strength, and wisdom. So the next time that you’re faced with multiple paths to take, choose wisely. The easiest way is not always the best way.
We're All Mountain Climbers
Sometimes when looking for clear pasture the only thing visible is mountains. Yes mountains. You've been trying to figure out how you're going to get make it and you peer out seeking resolution and there before you stands this gigantic being that can only be tackled with endurance and strength. So you step up and look at it first with contempt and then with determination. You can't stay where you are and if the only way for you to make it over this hurdle in life is to climb this mountain, then climb this mountain you shall.
When we face challenges within our lives we sometimes hope to overcome them with as little effort as possible but that just isn't the case in all matters. There will be times when we'll just have to put on our adult size shoes and climb. We all have that inner strength stored up that's just waiting to be used. You're going to make it. Giving up isn't an option.
Follow me on instagram: @ink82paper Twitter: @sipcarmelcoffee
Have you ever met your supposedly Mr. or Mrs. Right at the wrong time? Sure you have! We all have. We've waited long and hard to find that one person that possesses the 80% that we just know we can stretch into 100% but then we're hit with the age old excuse that, 'they're just not ready.' Indecisiveness at it's finest. So we date just to avoid the pain staking reality that the person who we truly want to date is playing around or who is most commonly, just not interested. And that's okay. But what's not okay is never telling the emotionally vested person that you're just not interested in pursuing anything further than a friendship. Why is it so hard for the uninterested party to just say so?
Majority of the time, it can simply be attributed to selfishness. You're satisfying a portion of what they are desiring at that particular moment and because they have more than likely made you aware of the fact that there's no chance of a romantic future together, they'll continue using you until either they get bored, find what they truly want, or YOU leave. That is always an option. It has been said time and time again that if a person wants to be with you, they will. Point blank. Don't try and make excuses for them. When you know that your feelings are involved, don't then create mechanisms to deal with the constant pain of rejection, but eliminate it. That's not saying that you have to be cruel or mean to that person, just make them aware of how you're feeling and express the need to distance yourself from the situation. Under no circumstances should you allow yourself to be continuously hurt in exchange for someone else's pleasure.
In the end, you have to do what's best for you. In the case of a relationship, if someone wants to be with you, they will. If they don't, they won't. There's no mean time in between time. Guard your heart and walk away. You deserve so much more. No your worth.