Davina Sims
  • HOME
    • About
  • DAILY MOTIVATION
  • BLOG
  • Lifestyle
    • Wellness
    • Style
    • Parenting
    • Food
    • Relationships
    • POETRY/SHORT STORIES
  • Contact

FORGIVENESS by Davina Sims

9/12/2014

9 Comments

 

When majority of us hear the word forgiveness, our eyes become downcast because it's the one area where most of us often feel like failures. Admittingly, there's a lot of strength characteristically involved in the act that most of us don't always possess or choose to willingly act upon. Frequently, we take the easy road when it comes to this matter because, humanistically, we're self absorbed and would rather do what makes us feel better, even if the results or satisfaction weighed is temporary. Being no different from anyone else who would rather shy away from the topic, I wonder if forgiving will ever become an effortless deed.

It seems that in childhood, forgiving someone for an offense was easier. Now we combat with the notion that if we forgive too quickly, that we've somehow let the offending party off too easy, when in fact, we've allowed our lives to be free of an unnecessary burdening. I can recall personally being scold by my parents and older siblings and experiencing hurt and embarrassment that cut like a knife, but before the day was gone, it was as if nothing had ever happened. As I now remember, I would revisit the hurtful experience only if it occurred again. But then, once again, I would forgive. So what changes from adolescence to adulthood? Do our many encounters with having to forgive create a negative coping mechanism? Does high expectation accompanied with disappointment decrease our ability to forgive? These are the questions that often loom the subconscious in an effort to discover what many find difficulty dealing with.   

I gave an example on how I was able to forgive without difficulty when I was younger, but as I began to age, things began to alter. For those, by whom hands I'd experience pain from more frequently, I became resentful towards. I didn't hate them, I was just aware of certain behavioral patterns that created a distance in our relationship, as was the case with many of us. But the hardest time that I'd ever had with forgiving someone, was when I had to forgive myself.

Years ago, my mother fell ill and when there was nothing more that the doctors could do, they sent her home to spend her final days with those closest to her. Siblings flew in from out of state and the house swarmed with many visitors to bid farewell or to pray against it. On one particular day, I found myself performing task that I didn't even think that I was capable of rendering and by the time the sun set, I was exhausted. Before I went to lay across the room on the sofa positioned adjacent to my mothers hospital bed, she whispered softly, "Come lie next to me." I really can't decipher if it was the exhaustion talking or if I really thought that the hospital bed wasn't big enough for the both of us, but I told her that I didn't want to hurt her. So I kissed her goodnight and went to sleep. A few hours later, I woke to check on her, only to find out that she had passed on and the only thing that I could think about at that moment, was being her last disappointment. I carried a spirit of suicide with me all the way to college. It wasn't until after a few years had gone by that I was able to speak about it and that initial talk was with God. I expressed my anger, my hurt, my frustration, with everyone including myself. I was constantly plagued with the thoughts, 'why me?' NO LONGER. I cried and prayed the most honest and sincerest prayer and I immediately experienced the power of forgiveness. It was as if someone had lifted a heavy weight from off my chest and it didn't come by or through any other form, other than the One that created and mandated that I forgive. By the One, who said that He wouldn't forgive if I didn't.

So if you find that you're having difficulty with forgiving someone or maybe even forgiving yourself, seek God. That is how I found my road to forgiveness and I'm sure if you desire it, He'll help you too. Seek...Pray...Forgive.




Davina S.







9 Comments
Adelras
9/11/2014 01:04:18 pm

Wow! Up close & personal...found your "Road Of Forgiveness?" I take you're still driving lol...but seriously, thank u for sharing abt ur mother's last days. I had a visual in my mind of her asking u to lay with her. The whole blog was touching and refreshing ~KiDD

Reply
DAVINA SIMS
9/11/2014 01:05:23 pm

Thanks Kidd!!!

Reply
J.Leigh
9/11/2014 07:42:35 pm

Deep. I learned something about your past I did not know.

Reply
EKG
9/12/2014 09:54:23 am

WOW !!! Excellent writing skills. To tie everything together with first a captivating introduction that makes u think about urself first, then to give a past experience leading into a more deeper look at wut truly lied beneath. Then to conclude it the most powerful answer there is.... Faith. absolutely tho sad but beautiful....

Reply
DAVINA SIMS
9/13/2014 01:57:32 am

Thanks for reading J

Reply
DAVINA SIMS
9/13/2014 01:59:02 am

Thanks for your support E!

Reply
Martell
9/14/2014 08:37:22 am

Powerful piece here. I think it's tough to forgive others because it can make you feel somewhat weak. At time we may also fear that the person we are forgiving, may become arrogang, and will perceive us as being weak. However, when done effectively, we can move on from that person, and remove past frustrations and bitterness. On the other hand, it's very difficult for us to forgive ourself, because while we can eventually move on from a disappointment, we can never move away from ourselves the way we can other people. We must fully deal confront the issue, gain clarity, and devote our energy to making amends for our shortcoming, possibly by vowing to help others, before we can truly forgive ourselves. I think one of the ways you are doing this is by being transparent, and sharing yule experiences, which helps others more than you may know. Props to

Reply
Ramon Sims
9/15/2014 12:48:24 pm

Very well written. It was heartfelt, inspiring, and enlightening. Well done

Reply
Chanelle
10/5/2014 12:21:44 pm

Well written. Made me think about some things. ...

Reply



Leave a Reply.

       subscribe

    Subscribe to Newsletter

    Archives

    February 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    August 2019
    May 2019
    February 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    July 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014

    Enter your email address:

    Delivered by FeedBurner

    Subscribe to Davina sims  - Blog by Email

    RSS Feed

©2021davinasims.com

Email: contact@davinasims.com

Photos used under Creative Commons from Jeffrey, Infomastern, symphony of love, Michel_Rathwell
  • HOME
    • About
  • DAILY MOTIVATION
  • BLOG
  • Lifestyle
    • Wellness
    • Style
    • Parenting
    • Food
    • Relationships
    • POETRY/SHORT STORIES
  • Contact