We've all heard the saying, 'The hearts wants, what the heart wants,' and I find that statement to carry much truth. But just as its truth has lingered in majority of our lives, so has the detriment of heartbreak when what the heart wants, isn't necessarily what the heart needs. Whether it's accredited to personality or mere infatuation, we sometimes find ourselves wanting what we can't have or simply shouldn't. Sometimes we're not even aware at all as to why we're so drawn to particular people. But one thing that we are cognizant of is that once the heart gets involved, common logic evaporates. Having placed my heart at fates disposal, I've allowed myself to feel deeply without restraint because to me, that kind of love felt the best. That's usually when you haven't been hurt badly and their slight indiscretions are forgivable and at the same time, you're learning something new with each decision that they make, whether you're in absolute agreement with it or not. There's an emotional rush that accompanies both the good and bad choices because you're becoming more knowledgeable of this person that has captivated you. And although these feelings can be mesmerizing, how long can you survive off of them alone? What can cause two people who share such great chemistry to never quite make it to an eternal relationship?
Everyone has that special thing in which they look for in a mate and when they find it, begin to build upon it. That thing becomes the connecting force. When you get married, there's an unspoken about sigh of relief. You exhale away the anxiety of no longer being apart of the arena of people who experience love but who patiently wait to see if their love is sufficient enough to rid the other person of any desire to ever be loved by anyone besides them. You feel as though you've made it out of the abyss. You know love and you feel like love knows you because you've experienced it before but never in the magnitude that you're responsible for it now. But upon arrival to such a place, many tend to question, 'did the previous suitors not see my love as being enough'?
When that admiration and connection isn't enough, you'll find yourself going through the same lessons over and over again without ever growing past the experiences that can either break a couple or develop them. Infidelity becomes intrusively apparent and a lack of commitment is displayed. Could this be a result of love not being enough, or just not being in love. Many choose to ignore the differences and become greatly disappointed when what they share, never grows into anything more. Love is for everyone but being in love is for companionship. We love our friends, family, pets, so on and so on, but being in love however is quite different. When someone is in love there is a certain calmness involved as with being married. You feel secure. You know that there may be things about you that the other person isn't particularly fond of but they're willing to accept them solely because of who you are to them. When it's just love, infatuation, those same flaws aren't overlooked and begin to peal away at the relationship once noticed. It's the same as how you love a friend or a family member. You notice things that you don't like but you don't love them any less. You do however tend to spend less time with them. Perhaps that explains why couples who aren't in love, shouldn't or never actually get married.
If you're currently dealing with someone that you have true feelings for but find yourself wondering whether or not they may be feeling the same way, take notice to how you were when the I love u's were first exchanged. As time has passed, has the love grown or diminished? Have what you've learned about each other over the course of time caused you to envision a future or has it made you more apprehensive about one? Being in love is finding a soul, a likeness, that you just don't want to do without. Now are you in love or do you simply just love them?